Saturday, September 26, 2009
I stumbled upon my old journals today. I was feeling ambitious and thought I'd rummage through some old stuff and get rid of it. But of course and as usual.. I opened one of my journals and started reading. I took it into the living room and read the entire thing. I have written in a journal every single day since December 30, 1996. So since then each day has been recorded. After reading the journal I realized things have changed SO MUCH.
I was surrounded with people all of the time. I can't believe how many people I surrounded myself with. Of course it's because I was still in high school and I really didn't have much of a choice. But it just occurred to me that things are so different now. I think of my priorities during this journal and my current priorities. I worried about Josh, or Nate liking me.. Will Kirk know how much he hurt me? Now I worry about how many people are going to come to the wedding, and hoping that we have enough room for everyone we care about. Work was just something I had to do so that I had some extra cash to buy Christmas presents with or to waste at the bar. Work is something I still have to do.. to pay off loans and credit cards and to put away for the upcoming wedding. I was concerned with who to take to prom and being rejected. I'm concerned that I am not as good at my job as I try to be. A good time was being told that I was hot by 3 guys at the bar and making out with one of my guy friends. Now a good time is any Friday because it's finally the weekend! and going to visit my nephew Quinn and getting to bond with him.
I enjoyed looking back at what life was like for me in 2003. But now I am where I'm at and I have to admit.. I'm pretty damn happy about it. I'm happy that I own a house at 24. I am overjoyed that I have my one, best friend to live and grow with and MARRY this summer. I feel like I am at a great place with each of my family members. My best friend is my sister. I look forward to each time I get to see her. We're crossing our fingers in hope that Kyli and her fresh family will move here sometime in the next year. Life would be ideal then.
Life is good. It's nice to look back on how my life used to be and at the same time appreciate where I came from and how I got here. I like where I am and I am anticipating what is to come for me and my future family.