Friday, September 27, 2013

Girl Time

 I am a loyal Ellen watcher. I think everyone knows who I'm referring to when I simply say, Ellen. Ellen Degeneres is most definitely at the peak of her career. Everyone loves her, knows who she is and wants her attention. Last season, she had her friend Bethenny Frankel on the show several times. Bethenny originally started out on The Real Housewives of New York and exploded like a bomb all over t.v after that. She starred in a few reality shows, became an author and a successful entrepreneur. Now she has her own daytime television show called, "Bethenny". At first I wasn't sure about her when she appeared on Ellen. I found her annoying and just to be too much. But, once her show premiered this fall, I started watching. I came to realize that her show is a lot like a girl's night out, with my gal pals. After a week of watching, I am now a fan. She talks openly about everything; sex, marriage,break ups, celebrities, etc. I enjoy listening to her panel of "experts" discuss various topics. The content is usually about things we only discuss with our best of girlfriends, while drinking too much wine. That, is what I am digging about "Bethenny". 


 Do you ever go out with your girlfriends and tell yourself; I will not talk about that, that is way too personal. My significant other would just die if he knew I was even thinking about talking about that.. As soon as you enter the room, the wine is opened and so is your mouth. Out spills exactly what you prepped yourself not to discuss..!! I do it all of the time. I confess, I have a BIG mouth. I don't mean to, but I just get excited being around my girls or any girls and the vibe is right and I just have to share..
 I will admit that moving to a different province from where I grew up is hard. The people I grew up around are big mouths too. They chat about inappropriate stuff all of  the time. But I quickly discovered that people from British Columbia are not the same. They are more likely going to quiet down once I start getting inappropriate and just listen. I can't tell if they're offended and shocked by what I have said and their silence is simply just their loss for words. Or, are they simply being quiet because they like what I'm saying and don't hear enough of it and want me to continue? Either way, I continue.. What is fun about being quiet and not jumping into a juicy, hot topic of discussion with a bunch of harmless women? I'll tell you; NOTHING. Women that are surrounded by their demanding children and their MALE significant others need to let out some of that female steam. I say, MALE because they are simply not female. Women need other women in their lives. I know I do.

 Moving to British Columbia has been tough on me, based on friendships only. I do have friends. Ladies that I used to play baseball with, that invite me out to their birthday parties, epicure parties and to go on mommy dates during the day. I absolutely value all of these outings because without them I would be very bored. But, I still haven't connected with that one woman enough that I feel like I can grab the phone and call her up to talk about .. nothing. I do have texting friendships. Bah- the 21st century is such a bitch on my social life. It's good and it's bad. I text another woman almost daily just to see what she's up to with her little girl. I enjoy being able to do that because then I don't have to commit to having a full conversation. She has a baby, I have a baby. We're busy and not busy all at once. Like for instance right now.. Alina was having a nap. While she napped, I quickly got dressed, put on make up, etc. Then I was distracted by the dirty bathroom, so I quickly cleaned it. Then, I realized I hadn't finished washing the dishes, so I washed them. Rob called me from work and tells me about his day so far, while he eats his lunch. I make another cup of coffee because I know this one will be enjoyed hot. I start writing in my blog today and baby girl wakes up. She is awake right now, blowing raspberries and rolling around in her crib. I'm watching her in her monitor.


 She's fine, but that just goes to show that I was just busy for the last half an hour, doing nothing. If a friend had phoned during that half hour I would have ignored it. I feel like my time.. I mean my time is too precious. I only get a few half hour bursts in a day. I appreciate them and try to do things for me at that time. So I suppose texting friends suits me just fine for right now.

 Holly, my best bud that I met out here in B.C. We met almost eight years ago, working at a coffee shop. Our friendship blossomed from there. I would base our friendship on the fact that we liked to party together. We usually each had a bottle of wine, played some music and talked our little faces off. I went to her house once and we made cupcakes, nachos and had a full on girl gab night until we cried. No joke, we both ended the night crying because 1. We got pretty drunk. 2. We got into some deep discussions about some really personal stuff. 3. We were allowed to be open with each other. No judgment, just girl gab. I loved every minute of it. (Not so much the morning after, but those are decisions we have to make in order to have a really good night with a really good friend!)

Oh yeah, Holly and I always end up dressing up in prom dresses, use props for pictures or just wear goofy hats. I love my Holls. She is B.C. born and now living in Alberta.
Kimberly is my mommy buddy. We work together, and both became pregnant around the same time. We had our pregnancies in common, we have our baby girls in common and we text each other on a regular basis. We hang out with our girls and it is really nice to have a friend to have things in common with. It's so important to have a girlfriend that shares current experiences with you. Kim and I hang out, doing mommy things. We both agree, that it would be nice if we could get together for more enjoyable things; like having a box glass of wine.


Carmelle was my party pal. She is from back home and was always, always up for a good time. She was willing to do anything, as long as she knew it was going to be fun. Carmelle and I were the closest in grade 12. She was always the go-to friend you went to immediately after a harsh break up. She would always make you feel better. She was always having parties at her house, despite her mother's shaking fist. Carmelle was a good time. She visited this summer and I can't remember laughing so hard in a long, long time.


Morgan is my childhood friend that I met in grade four and we hit it off immediately. She is also the friend I mentioned as my pen pal in my last post. We shared the love of reading and writing. Morgan and I had different groups of friends in high school. But we never stopped being buddies. I love my friendship with Morgan because we can always pick up where we last left off. It doesn't matter if it was eight years ago, we will always be able to find something interesting to talk about. I love chatting with Morgan, the most actually, on the phone. The only bad thing about talking to her on the phone is that we can talk for three hours without even thinking about it. So sadly, we don't get a chance to talk much anymore. We actually have to schedule in a phone date. How sad is that!? I value Morgan's friendship because it has lasted the test of time. I think we'll forever be friends. We'll be writing letters as old ladies. I truly believe that.


Katie, my best friend. We have known each other since grade two. We had play dates together, where we played Barbies. We lived in the same neighbourhood so we spent a lot of time after school together. Katie and I grew to be very close. She was the one friend that was always there for me emotionally, throughout every break up, every tragedy, everything. She's amazing. She has a tough exterior but a huge, warm heart. Katie is also my dirtiest minded friend. Her head is always in the gutter, in fact it lives in the gutter. She says things that you want to say, but don't. She is also a great person to talk to. She is the one and only friend that I talk on the phone with regularly. We always had a lot in common. Today, we are the two friends that are married and have kids of our own.



Family is obviously most important. But every once in awhile, when the family is making me cuckoo I need to get away. When Rob isn't paying attention to what I am saying and I realize it after I have been talking animatedly for a few minutes.. Or maybe the baby is just so demanding that I want to be able to pee without having to leave her howling in another room.. I may just need a female outing. An evening away from the demands and the deaf ears. I want to be able to talk about a good looking tattooed dad at the pool the other day. It's harmless, but he was cute and I want to tell someone! Or about how I am dealing with being a new-ish mom and balancing being a wife and ME all at once. I want to bitch about having to be the one who remembers to clean the toilet.. Weird! It doesn't just clean itself!!!
 A girl's night out doesn't necessarily mean that it has to be out at a club or even dancing. I just want to be in a room with women, some tunes, great finger food, some drinks and the freedom to talk.. It's like medicine to my soul. It gives me the reboot I need, to face the days ahead. I probably get a good girl's night out every few months. (lately.) I am currently working on getting together with Rob's Aunties. They are the best, and they always know how to have a little fun.


4 comments:

menopausalweirdness said...

Gotta love Girl time with your gal pals!! Sounds like you have some wonderful friends! I agree about Ellen and Bethenny - Love them both.!!

Areeba said...

Oh Haley, so fun post! I was going to email you about my girlfriends, we have no more issues and we had superb girls-morning-out-in-school! That's damn true that girly time is a remedy! I know I tell myself to be calm down and don't expose everything but you know, it's uncontrollable!!! :D

Noor said...

I can't tell you how true is that . Everytime I try to get sophisticated with a bunch of girls , I know it's not possible . Like if some kinda cute guy is around *ahem ahem*
You've got some really good friends , I consider you lucky :) I am sure when you guys would do meet up , it's gonna rock .
As long as it's about bloggy buddies , you can always have me , ya know!

Haley said...

Ali-
Hey! I forgot about you! You were more mom's friend.. BUT I totally considered you a friend of mine all mine too.
Ellen is seriously the best. So funny..and such a great person.