On Top Of The Beauty Spot

Hiking is fun apparently? Wow, who am I?

Rob and I decided last Sunday or so to go for a hike. It was quite the work out for this ..untrained little body. Well, the sad thing was .. was that I had been swimming and running and was having a hard time breathing, while Rob is behind me..smoking as he's climbing up the mountain. He held his own embarrassingly well, compared to me. Haha, no we both did really great.

See we do these things together and I can't help but smile when I think back to it. I am proud in this relationship. I don't know if I've ever felt so proud in any relationship, well at least not this much. I am proud of who I am. My working up to feeling.. better about myself is helping as well. Rob isn't shy about telling me that I am doing well. Which is a great feeling. I enjoy him so much.

Last night we decorated the Christmas tree and he kept me focused on the task at hand. As well as the fact that I seem to automatically numb myself in these kinds of situations. Decorating the Christmas tree was always a big thing in our home. Kyli bought mom and Rudi ornaments that reminded her of them. Popeye, Big Bears ..etc. So naturally seeing all of these ornaments and knowing that Rob or I had to put them on and not Rudi, was tough. But I held on throughout it. .... until I returned to Rob's house. I snuck off to the bathroom when Rob was on the phone and BAWLED. Again.

But like I said, this guy is amazing and stepped up to the plate.. that was abandoned... and he took care of me. I love it when he does that. It makes me feel so much better. He holds me ... and holds me tight while my entire body vibrates with sorrow. I love that.

I know that I'll be okay without him this Christmas. I realize that it is going to be tough. But I think I can handle just about anything these days.. And No God, that is not a challenge..