"Go Dog Go" by Dr. Seus .. this is the theme of my vacation since I got here on Thursday. We literally had not stopped until last night. We have been busy with friends, sight-seeing, more friends, drinking and partying that we just realized we only have one week left of our time here.
I went fishing with eight boys on Sunday. I don't even want to get into how I got to this one lake. Rob's dad is a crazy driver, that does not care if there is a road to drive on.... It looked as if we just decided to turn off the road into the bushes and somehow, we might find the lake eventually. Of course this is his favourite, "secret" lake and he knew exactly where we were going the entire time. At the time, I did not feel like he knew what he was doing... It was an adventure, but one that I won't be forgetting.
Last night Rob and I had the camp all to ourselves. It was actually one of the first romantic things that we've ever done. We were all alone, at the edge of a gorgeous lake. We had a fire in the wood stove, had some candles lit and he even played me a few tunes before bed. It was nice to find my head again after all of the chaos of meeting tons of people and seeing everything I need to see.
I really like the people that I am meeting here because they are all so genuine. Each one of Rob's friends are real.. I like that. I am beginning to understand why Rob talks so much about this place, and it is because of the people, his buddies. They really do make a place like T.Bay feel like home.
Tuesday, August 22, 2006
Friday, August 18, 2006
Flying Forward
Here I am. I am a long way from home that's for sure. We traveled across Canada the other night on a midnight flight. It wasn't as bad as I had imagined. At the same time, it felt very exhausting getting off of our four hour flight into Toronto. I think the time difference of three hours really does something to the average person as well. We lost three hours mid flight. So to us, it was 2:30 am and the sun was just starting to come up beside us. That is so fascinating. Rob said, "Look baby, we're flying into the future."
Rob and I did fairly well for our first flying trip. We only argued once because we were both very tired, and hungry and thirsty.. Because of all that has happened recently, bottled water and drinks are banned from airplanes and airports. So when a water is ordered anywhere, (which it HAS to be because the vending machines are all closed) a person is over charged and the water has to be poured into a cup. It feels like prison. We were all in our closed off smoking area in the airport and everyone is looking for a light because their lighters all got taken away by customs. we have to look for the man in uniform if we want a light. (pilots, airport staff) We all sit together and exchange war stories.
"I lost my lighter at customs..had to throw it right in the garbage."
"Oh yeah, well they said I could bring my lip balm, and it turns out I had the wrong kind.. not in a tube, but in a little container..and pfff that was the end of that."
We arrived in T.Bay at 7:00 B.C time, 10:00 O.N time. We were ridiculously exhausted from the flight but that didn't stop us. We visited a few of Rob's friends that weren't working and started to drink. But as the night went on, we came to find that we were just too out of it, to even be able to get drunk enough where we could have a crazy, woopin' good time. So we played it low key and were in bed by 12:30 (9:30 our time..hehe)
The weather is a whole different story. It is so humid here I feel like I'm in Louisiana again. I have not felt heat like that. It was only 29 and it felt like 35+. Apparently it is supposed to go up to 46 in the next week. Ahh I can't even imagine what that's like. (I'm talking celcius b.t.w..for those american fans I have..) This morning felt like a real summer vacation morning. I don't even think that that makes sense, but it just felt like I was truly on vacation, because that kind of heat is so welcoming and awesome early on in the day.
I met all of Bob's close guy friends.. el quadro...as I am told together they are all called. I have to force myself to be the tourist and take loads of pictures so we can make a vacation album together. I have some pictures but I'm at a different computer, and doing all of that just might be too much work for me today.
I am happy to be here, learning more and more about my boy each day..
Rob and I did fairly well for our first flying trip. We only argued once because we were both very tired, and hungry and thirsty.. Because of all that has happened recently, bottled water and drinks are banned from airplanes and airports. So when a water is ordered anywhere, (which it HAS to be because the vending machines are all closed) a person is over charged and the water has to be poured into a cup. It feels like prison. We were all in our closed off smoking area in the airport and everyone is looking for a light because their lighters all got taken away by customs. we have to look for the man in uniform if we want a light. (pilots, airport staff) We all sit together and exchange war stories.
"I lost my lighter at customs..had to throw it right in the garbage."
"Oh yeah, well they said I could bring my lip balm, and it turns out I had the wrong kind.. not in a tube, but in a little container..and pfff that was the end of that."
We arrived in T.Bay at 7:00 B.C time, 10:00 O.N time. We were ridiculously exhausted from the flight but that didn't stop us. We visited a few of Rob's friends that weren't working and started to drink. But as the night went on, we came to find that we were just too out of it, to even be able to get drunk enough where we could have a crazy, woopin' good time. So we played it low key and were in bed by 12:30 (9:30 our time..hehe)
The weather is a whole different story. It is so humid here I feel like I'm in Louisiana again. I have not felt heat like that. It was only 29 and it felt like 35+. Apparently it is supposed to go up to 46 in the next week. Ahh I can't even imagine what that's like. (I'm talking celcius b.t.w..for those american fans I have..) This morning felt like a real summer vacation morning. I don't even think that that makes sense, but it just felt like I was truly on vacation, because that kind of heat is so welcoming and awesome early on in the day.
I met all of Bob's close guy friends.. el quadro...as I am told together they are all called. I have to force myself to be the tourist and take loads of pictures so we can make a vacation album together. I have some pictures but I'm at a different computer, and doing all of that just might be too much work for me today.
I am happy to be here, learning more and more about my boy each day..
Friday, August 11, 2006
Mornings of the Past
Anticipation. That is all I feel right now. I am anticipating so many things at this point. I am so excited for tomorrow when I get to see my brother again! I still can't believe it's been eight months since I saw him last! To think, we used to live under the same roof for many, many years. It is an odd thing to think back way back when it was normal to live at home, with your siblings.
I was talking about that.. I took myself back to Hinton, in my old bedroom. The mornings where I would sleep in until I felt. Back when sleeping in wasn't something to feel guilty about. I could hear my parents croaky voices coming out of the kitchen in the early mornings. Rudi would be up for work and my mom always, always woke up with him. I could hear Rudi talking to the puppies in his.."sweet puppy voice". I smiled thinking about it. He talked to me like that when I was little too, and sometimes when I wasn't feeling too good. Another smile. Then there would be silence for much of the morning, until my sister woke. She usually got up before me and most definetly before Lincoln. I could hear her and mom having coffee. I think sometimes I'd even hear the coffee brewing. That was usually when I wanted to make myself wake up because I always loved getting in on the morning coffee and smoke.
There would be mornings where Kyli, Mom and I would get up and sit around talking for hours before we'd have showers, get out of our pajamas.. Those were the good old days. When we were all comfortable because we were home. Now when we all get together, someone isn't truly home. At mom's.. she's home, but the rest of us aren't. It's a comfortable place, but it will never be like our homes before, when we all shared the same kitchen and bathrooms.
I can't believe all of that is over. To think that I never really knew what I had. I wish I could tell people to appreciate those small things. I'm sure I'm taking a few for granted here as I sit typing away. We never truly see what we have until we don't anymore. When I think about it, I don't have a mortgage or children to take care of. In ten years from now, even five I'll think about how my life was so good now. No kids to wake me up. My days off of work, were really and truly days off, for the most part.
Being from a divorced home, I am used to the fact that my "family" aren't together very often. But, now that Ruder's gone, there really isn't a place or time that we'll all ever truly be together again. Well maybe, one day... when we've all passed on.. Who knows.
My family life.. awww. Thinking about it is bittersweet. I know it wasn't perfect. We fought and slammed doors as much as the next family. But there's just something about family that nothing exceeds. Family is it. It's there always, whether a person likes it .. or not.
Tomorrow I work, and wish I didn't. Only because my brother gets in early in the morning and I have to be tortured, knowing he's here and not be able to get to see him until after four. He said he'd probably stop by my work. I'm excited, but that's even more torture really! I'll want to tag along like I always did. When I was four and busted them for sneaking out in the hallway to watch t.v after bedtime. They said I had huge feet (though I think they were exxagerating!) and I'd stomp really loud behind them and this would be the siren that allowed our folks to know we were out of bed..again. Or.. when Kyli and Lincoln went to their firsts day of highschool together.. I sat in the window and watched them as they nervously walked down the road to their bus stop, wishing so much that I could go. Fully knowing that one day I would have to do that same walk... but without them. It's not as drastic of a feeling this time around but I am going to wish to run after them as they leave the shop.
There will be much more to tell as the weekend unfolds... Pictures to see and more family memories to make, with the loved ones I still have.
I was talking about that.. I took myself back to Hinton, in my old bedroom. The mornings where I would sleep in until I felt. Back when sleeping in wasn't something to feel guilty about. I could hear my parents croaky voices coming out of the kitchen in the early mornings. Rudi would be up for work and my mom always, always woke up with him. I could hear Rudi talking to the puppies in his.."sweet puppy voice". I smiled thinking about it. He talked to me like that when I was little too, and sometimes when I wasn't feeling too good. Another smile. Then there would be silence for much of the morning, until my sister woke. She usually got up before me and most definetly before Lincoln. I could hear her and mom having coffee. I think sometimes I'd even hear the coffee brewing. That was usually when I wanted to make myself wake up because I always loved getting in on the morning coffee and smoke.
There would be mornings where Kyli, Mom and I would get up and sit around talking for hours before we'd have showers, get out of our pajamas.. Those were the good old days. When we were all comfortable because we were home. Now when we all get together, someone isn't truly home. At mom's.. she's home, but the rest of us aren't. It's a comfortable place, but it will never be like our homes before, when we all shared the same kitchen and bathrooms.
I can't believe all of that is over. To think that I never really knew what I had. I wish I could tell people to appreciate those small things. I'm sure I'm taking a few for granted here as I sit typing away. We never truly see what we have until we don't anymore. When I think about it, I don't have a mortgage or children to take care of. In ten years from now, even five I'll think about how my life was so good now. No kids to wake me up. My days off of work, were really and truly days off, for the most part.
Being from a divorced home, I am used to the fact that my "family" aren't together very often. But, now that Ruder's gone, there really isn't a place or time that we'll all ever truly be together again. Well maybe, one day... when we've all passed on.. Who knows.
My family life.. awww. Thinking about it is bittersweet. I know it wasn't perfect. We fought and slammed doors as much as the next family. But there's just something about family that nothing exceeds. Family is it. It's there always, whether a person likes it .. or not.
Tomorrow I work, and wish I didn't. Only because my brother gets in early in the morning and I have to be tortured, knowing he's here and not be able to get to see him until after four. He said he'd probably stop by my work. I'm excited, but that's even more torture really! I'll want to tag along like I always did. When I was four and busted them for sneaking out in the hallway to watch t.v after bedtime. They said I had huge feet (though I think they were exxagerating!) and I'd stomp really loud behind them and this would be the siren that allowed our folks to know we were out of bed..again. Or.. when Kyli and Lincoln went to their firsts day of highschool together.. I sat in the window and watched them as they nervously walked down the road to their bus stop, wishing so much that I could go. Fully knowing that one day I would have to do that same walk... but without them. It's not as drastic of a feeling this time around but I am going to wish to run after them as they leave the shop.
There will be much more to tell as the weekend unfolds... Pictures to see and more family memories to make, with the loved ones I still have.
Wednesday, August 09, 2006
Between These Lines
Timid- lacking self confidence, fearful and hesitant.
I have been told recently that I am far too timid. That I am so far gone into timid, that she worries. She wants to get me out of my little, timid turtle shell ASAP. Hmmm..
Of course I am immediately offended, as I usually react to anything such as this. But for some reason I can't seem to shake it. I think that reason is because.. it's true.
I hate it when people are insecure. I don't let others know it right away. Though I do have a problem with eye contact. I've had this for so many years. She blames my mom for not distilling this quality a person is supposed to aquire from his parents. Hmm.. again I am offended. Don't attack the parents. Especially my mom because it hasn't been easy for her. I'm not talking about recently either. Ever. Life has not been easy for her ever. So back off.
But again, she is correct. I do have a problem with eye contact. Someone told me once, that I had sad eyes. That comment has really stuck with me. I guess I have to trust a person to really look into his eyes. So at work I will gaze. But I won't stay on them. Today for instance a man was looking right into my eyes. He was with another woman and it made me uncomfortable. I figured he was trying to pull me in or something, have a silent affair. Why do I think such things? You'd think I've been through more in my life, like being sexually assaulted.
So what's with this trust issue I have? I still don't get it. I could be my own psychologist..and really dig deep:
1- your parents were divorced at a young age. This causes you early disapointment in life. Teaching you not to let yourself get hurt.
2- you have had some pretty ugly relationships in your past. One being a first love that turned into a cheating, suicidal, coke head. (though I think things are better for him. And I'm glad)..Another being.. When the going got tough, the tough certainly didn't get going..rather he decided to stay behind and leave me to face my new life alone. (and i know he's doing just fine. And that is another good thing.)
3- the one man you could rely on died suddenly, leaving you with this feeling of betrayal.
4- your mom's back. (that is an issue all in itself..and i'm sure a shrink would bring it up.)
Then I met Rob. He was like this teacher..this person that helped me walk again so to speak. He showed me that Love is not always a scary thing. He's been really amazing, since the day we met. He gets cranky from time to time. ahem tonight. But, it was one and my clicking on this doesn't help when he works in the morning.
So there are so many ways in which I can fix this. But how. I guess it's not going to be easy. I'm going to have to do things I don't want to do.
Another thing is I always bail out on everyone. I'm turning into my mom. I just would rather not go to a wedding shower, because... it's a wedding that I don't entirely have close feelings about. I think I would like to go to a wedding shower and be happy for the person, rather than have doubts and not want to say anything, knowing that she's probably heard it from everyone. How can I be a good friend if I'm never there.
Sure I get lonely. But I don't really deserve friends if I never go out with them. Or if I don't answer my phone when it rings. It's silly really. What am I so afraid of?? That's what I ask my mom when she's doing the exact same thing as me. Interesting.
All the answers are within myself. No one can really answer any of them for me. I just have to shut up long enough (in my head..which is entirely impossible, unless I am sleeping and then..I have the most bizarre dreams..) and listen for what I yearn for. I still don't know what that is. Courage? Friends? Confidence? Eye Contact? Assurance that I'll never get hurt again?
I guess I'll just have to wait..and let it come to me. Perhaps all I need to do .. is read this post in a few days..
I have been told recently that I am far too timid. That I am so far gone into timid, that she worries. She wants to get me out of my little, timid turtle shell ASAP. Hmmm..
Of course I am immediately offended, as I usually react to anything such as this. But for some reason I can't seem to shake it. I think that reason is because.. it's true.
I hate it when people are insecure. I don't let others know it right away. Though I do have a problem with eye contact. I've had this for so many years. She blames my mom for not distilling this quality a person is supposed to aquire from his parents. Hmm.. again I am offended. Don't attack the parents. Especially my mom because it hasn't been easy for her. I'm not talking about recently either. Ever. Life has not been easy for her ever. So back off.
But again, she is correct. I do have a problem with eye contact. Someone told me once, that I had sad eyes. That comment has really stuck with me. I guess I have to trust a person to really look into his eyes. So at work I will gaze. But I won't stay on them. Today for instance a man was looking right into my eyes. He was with another woman and it made me uncomfortable. I figured he was trying to pull me in or something, have a silent affair. Why do I think such things? You'd think I've been through more in my life, like being sexually assaulted.
So what's with this trust issue I have? I still don't get it. I could be my own psychologist..and really dig deep:
1- your parents were divorced at a young age. This causes you early disapointment in life. Teaching you not to let yourself get hurt.
2- you have had some pretty ugly relationships in your past. One being a first love that turned into a cheating, suicidal, coke head. (though I think things are better for him. And I'm glad)..Another being.. When the going got tough, the tough certainly didn't get going..rather he decided to stay behind and leave me to face my new life alone. (and i know he's doing just fine. And that is another good thing.)
3- the one man you could rely on died suddenly, leaving you with this feeling of betrayal.
4- your mom's back. (that is an issue all in itself..and i'm sure a shrink would bring it up.)
Then I met Rob. He was like this teacher..this person that helped me walk again so to speak. He showed me that Love is not always a scary thing. He's been really amazing, since the day we met. He gets cranky from time to time. ahem tonight. But, it was one and my clicking on this doesn't help when he works in the morning.
So there are so many ways in which I can fix this. But how. I guess it's not going to be easy. I'm going to have to do things I don't want to do.
Another thing is I always bail out on everyone. I'm turning into my mom. I just would rather not go to a wedding shower, because... it's a wedding that I don't entirely have close feelings about. I think I would like to go to a wedding shower and be happy for the person, rather than have doubts and not want to say anything, knowing that she's probably heard it from everyone. How can I be a good friend if I'm never there.
Sure I get lonely. But I don't really deserve friends if I never go out with them. Or if I don't answer my phone when it rings. It's silly really. What am I so afraid of?? That's what I ask my mom when she's doing the exact same thing as me. Interesting.
All the answers are within myself. No one can really answer any of them for me. I just have to shut up long enough (in my head..which is entirely impossible, unless I am sleeping and then..I have the most bizarre dreams..) and listen for what I yearn for. I still don't know what that is. Courage? Friends? Confidence? Eye Contact? Assurance that I'll never get hurt again?
I guess I'll just have to wait..and let it come to me. Perhaps all I need to do .. is read this post in a few days..
Monday, August 07, 2006
More In Store..
The boys, being boys..
There are so many great things happening in the next couple of weeks. Kyli and Joe came for a visit. They wanted badly to go to the BlueGrass Festival in Coombs. We all went on Saturday night and it was an okay time, for me personally. Rob got nice and liquored, but I think I held back because I am still taking my antibiotics.
Kyli and Joe seemed impressed again with our living situation. We do have a lovely home, a great backyard, lots of food in the cupboards (apparently..though I thought we were running low. ) It's always nice to impress someone like an older sister, a person I basically dedicated my adolesence to have notice me.
Yesterday was a fun day for sure. The boys went paintballing with Rob's boss. Kyli and I went to Aunt B's. We ate drunk chicken, my favourite macaroni salad and marinated steaks later on in the night. Around four in the morning Aunt B made all of us breakfast as well. I have to say, she is a fantastic host.
Robert and Joseph.... Those two are like peas in a pod when they are together. They get along really well. He definetly is like the big brother that Rob never had. Now that I come to think of it, Joe has two sisters, so it's kind of like that for him too. The two of them can talk up a storm because they always have something to talk about. They both play guitar and sing. They're dating "the sisters". I like that they can confide in each other about us whenever they need to.
The weekend was good. But next will be even better because MY BROTHER is coming to visit!! I couldn't be more excited. I haven't seen him since Christmas. It's coming close to a year that we haven't been around each other. Quite frankly, that is too damn long. Next Wednesday we leave for T. Bay as well. So this August is fun-filled for Rob and I.
I am just really looking forward to getting away from work for more than two days.
This weekend was good, but the ones to follow will be even better!!
At the BlueGrass Festival
There are so many great things happening in the next couple of weeks. Kyli and Joe came for a visit. They wanted badly to go to the BlueGrass Festival in Coombs. We all went on Saturday night and it was an okay time, for me personally. Rob got nice and liquored, but I think I held back because I am still taking my antibiotics.
Kyli and Joe seemed impressed again with our living situation. We do have a lovely home, a great backyard, lots of food in the cupboards (apparently..though I thought we were running low. ) It's always nice to impress someone like an older sister, a person I basically dedicated my adolesence to have notice me.
Yesterday was a fun day for sure. The boys went paintballing with Rob's boss. Kyli and I went to Aunt B's. We ate drunk chicken, my favourite macaroni salad and marinated steaks later on in the night. Around four in the morning Aunt B made all of us breakfast as well. I have to say, she is a fantastic host.
Robert and Joseph.... Those two are like peas in a pod when they are together. They get along really well. He definetly is like the big brother that Rob never had. Now that I come to think of it, Joe has two sisters, so it's kind of like that for him too. The two of them can talk up a storm because they always have something to talk about. They both play guitar and sing. They're dating "the sisters". I like that they can confide in each other about us whenever they need to.
The weekend was good. But next will be even better because MY BROTHER is coming to visit!! I couldn't be more excited. I haven't seen him since Christmas. It's coming close to a year that we haven't been around each other. Quite frankly, that is too damn long. Next Wednesday we leave for T. Bay as well. So this August is fun-filled for Rob and I.
I am just really looking forward to getting away from work for more than two days.
This weekend was good, but the ones to follow will be even better!!
At the BlueGrass Festival
Friday, August 04, 2006
Low Expectations
((Insert Pic of Me Bored)) - blogger didn't feel like allowing my other pic to show ...
The clock bells chime in the distance as I sit lazily in my chair, puffing grudgingly on my cigarette. Lately these stolen moments to have a smoke aren't as satisfying.
How is it that I continue to misplace my water every where I go? Or my notebook.. I used to have five notebooks at hand everywhere I looked. Now it seems I'm so busy... doing not much, to write like I used to. How that makes sense, I don't really know.
Each time the bells chime to introduce a new hour, it reminds me that I am still doing the same thing I was doing the last time the bells rang.
I'm not depressed nor am I unhappy. I'm just in a blah state. I have a bladder infection, I'm eating antibiotics and I'm watching Dinner and a Movie's bad skits in between a Ben Affleck chick flick on TBS.
I don't feel like sleeping or staying awake. I'm stuck here in .. limbo? I'm in a place where we're tired from all of our company we just had in July. I'm barely hanging on to every repetitive day at work, anticipating our trip to T. Bay. We have run out of good food and laundry detergent, but we don't want to go buy more food because we know we're leaving for two weeks.
Rob's job is taking a lot out of him. The poor guy works and sweats his balls off every day on top of a roof in the sweltering summer heat. Each day at work I anticipate those same bells that allow me to dash out of those doors. The same doors I swear I am going to run through mid shift oneday because I can. Once I'm off, I return home with big intentions to do the laundry, fold clothes, have a shower, brush my hair.. eat properly. Waaaay down the list... exercise.
HA-fuckin-HA! Not happening anytime soon.
Damn it- I reached for my water again it's still not there!!
I do have to say doing nothing gets dull. But it does feel great, knowing nothing is really expected of me. I think the same goes for sleeping beauty here next to me.
Carpe' Diem..
The clock bells chime in the distance as I sit lazily in my chair, puffing grudgingly on my cigarette. Lately these stolen moments to have a smoke aren't as satisfying.
How is it that I continue to misplace my water every where I go? Or my notebook.. I used to have five notebooks at hand everywhere I looked. Now it seems I'm so busy... doing not much, to write like I used to. How that makes sense, I don't really know.
Each time the bells chime to introduce a new hour, it reminds me that I am still doing the same thing I was doing the last time the bells rang.
I'm not depressed nor am I unhappy. I'm just in a blah state. I have a bladder infection, I'm eating antibiotics and I'm watching Dinner and a Movie's bad skits in between a Ben Affleck chick flick on TBS.
I don't feel like sleeping or staying awake. I'm stuck here in .. limbo? I'm in a place where we're tired from all of our company we just had in July. I'm barely hanging on to every repetitive day at work, anticipating our trip to T. Bay. We have run out of good food and laundry detergent, but we don't want to go buy more food because we know we're leaving for two weeks.
Rob's job is taking a lot out of him. The poor guy works and sweats his balls off every day on top of a roof in the sweltering summer heat. Each day at work I anticipate those same bells that allow me to dash out of those doors. The same doors I swear I am going to run through mid shift oneday because I can. Once I'm off, I return home with big intentions to do the laundry, fold clothes, have a shower, brush my hair.. eat properly. Waaaay down the list... exercise.
HA-fuckin-HA! Not happening anytime soon.
Damn it- I reached for my water again it's still not there!!
I do have to say doing nothing gets dull. But it does feel great, knowing nothing is really expected of me. I think the same goes for sleeping beauty here next to me.
Carpe' Diem..
Tuesday, August 01, 2006
So Long Sweet Heart..wellll It's Time To Go
August 1st is the day that my Erin, Baby J. moved back to T.Bay.
Airhead is a special girl. She always seems to have a really big impact on the people that she meets. She made so many friends in the short time that she has been living here. I am sure they will all miss her very much.
I have to say, she really gave me the right idea of what it would be like to have a baby sister. I say this because it sucks sometimes but in the end it is usually rewarding. I love Erin like my sister. But she was like a little sister in the sense that she was a bit of a brat while she was here. I am being honest. We had a couple of spats. But really, that's what sisters do. That is what made us closer, and closer. I wish that her and I could've been close. But I think she had it in her head that I was Rob's girlfriend and wherever he goes I go. This is true to a certain extent. I think he's always been quite critical of the people that she chooses to hang out with. So she didn't always want him around. Therefore, I was not really around very much.
Last night I told her straight up that I wanted to spend time with her. I was going wherever she was..and she seemed surprised yet pleased. We had a really good time. Though I kind of spent more time with her best friend Alex, from T.Bay. She was preoccupied with a guy that decided to like her right before she moved. Hmmmmmmm.
But the night ended with me encouraging Erin to steal chimes outside of the health food store .. and I pulled an entire flower plant right out of it's pretty, perfect flower bed...roots and all. Wow, three bottles of Pink Poison (shared of course) will do that to me! My point is, is that I did get to hang out with her the night before she left us. I am so glad that I did too.
Erin had a lot of company for the last little while. I got to meet quite a few people from T.Bay all of which I liked quite a bit.
First off is Amanda, her cutie pie room mate. Who doesn't love this girl? She is a total doll. She wouldn't hurt a fly and she is so modest. I love Amanda and hope to see her when I visit the Bay.
Alex is Erin's best best friend that just got here on Thursday so that she could join Erin on a huge road trip across Canada, back home. There were some obstacles to this new found friendship, that we didn't even care about. (I won't get into detail, not a biggy at all.) I really liked her as well. I spent a lot of time with her last night. She is also a little sweetie.
Taylor and Mark came for short visits. I liked them both and hope to see them soon. I didn't get to know them as well, but what I saw, I liked.
Erin brought a lot of things into my life. She's my little sis now and I am glad that she came for the time that she did, so that we could build the solid relationship that we now have.
I love you "wong" time Baby J.
* I stole these pics off of the computer, just to show these friends that Erin introduced me to..*
Erin and Mark in Vic
On my b'day..
Alex and Erin partying @ Irish with my Sis.
The crazy couple (joked about calling them
lesbos all the time. haha)
Mark and Erin on the ferry .. coming to HERE
Airhead is a special girl. She always seems to have a really big impact on the people that she meets. She made so many friends in the short time that she has been living here. I am sure they will all miss her very much.
I have to say, she really gave me the right idea of what it would be like to have a baby sister. I say this because it sucks sometimes but in the end it is usually rewarding. I love Erin like my sister. But she was like a little sister in the sense that she was a bit of a brat while she was here. I am being honest. We had a couple of spats. But really, that's what sisters do. That is what made us closer, and closer. I wish that her and I could've been close. But I think she had it in her head that I was Rob's girlfriend and wherever he goes I go. This is true to a certain extent. I think he's always been quite critical of the people that she chooses to hang out with. So she didn't always want him around. Therefore, I was not really around very much.
Last night I told her straight up that I wanted to spend time with her. I was going wherever she was..and she seemed surprised yet pleased. We had a really good time. Though I kind of spent more time with her best friend Alex, from T.Bay. She was preoccupied with a guy that decided to like her right before she moved. Hmmmmmmm.
But the night ended with me encouraging Erin to steal chimes outside of the health food store .. and I pulled an entire flower plant right out of it's pretty, perfect flower bed...roots and all. Wow, three bottles of Pink Poison (shared of course) will do that to me! My point is, is that I did get to hang out with her the night before she left us. I am so glad that I did too.
Erin had a lot of company for the last little while. I got to meet quite a few people from T.Bay all of which I liked quite a bit.
First off is Amanda, her cutie pie room mate. Who doesn't love this girl? She is a total doll. She wouldn't hurt a fly and she is so modest. I love Amanda and hope to see her when I visit the Bay.
Alex is Erin's best best friend that just got here on Thursday so that she could join Erin on a huge road trip across Canada, back home. There were some obstacles to this new found friendship, that we didn't even care about. (I won't get into detail, not a biggy at all.) I really liked her as well. I spent a lot of time with her last night. She is also a little sweetie.
Taylor and Mark came for short visits. I liked them both and hope to see them soon. I didn't get to know them as well, but what I saw, I liked.
Erin brought a lot of things into my life. She's my little sis now and I am glad that she came for the time that she did, so that we could build the solid relationship that we now have.
I love you "wong" time Baby J.
* I stole these pics off of the computer, just to show these friends that Erin introduced me to..*
Erin and Mark in Vic
On my b'day..
Alex and Erin partying @ Irish with my Sis.
The crazy couple (joked about calling them
lesbos all the time. haha)
Mark and Erin on the ferry .. coming to HERE
Saturday, July 22, 2006
A Summer Reality
Rob and I on the boat..
The night before at the beach.
This is the Dingy Dock Pub. So neat.
WOOOOW. It is HOT here. I know that it was hot in the summer back in Alberta. But this heat is intense. I am not complaining though. The summer rays always bring out the kids in us.
I came home from work today, and Mama J. had the sprinkler spraying up as she's yelling, "Wanna come in my shower!!?" I
love it. Summer time is the ideal time of the year. Some people can't hack the heat. But I personally say, buck up and enjoy the weather. I understand it gets to be too hot, and people get grumpy and tired. But always remember, you could be other places quite unpleasant. Being at work in a place where most people travel to on vacation is punishement. But while I am there I think about where else I could be that is worse. The hospital came to mind. Can you imagine being sick in the hospital during the summer, or ever for that matter?
Last night I went out with the famdamily and celebrated the summer by floating on a boat, alongside the BC ferries, the marina and AN OCEAN PUB. It felt like I was on my own little mini-vacation. I had a hell of a busy day at work and then I got to be a tourist and drink beers and visit with family. It was the perfect reward.
I like these new people in my life. Thinking back to a year ago I would never have imagined life to be like this. Rob, Mom and I are all celebrating our one year of living here this week. It's a celebration of the times already shared, and the ones to follow.
I welcome this summer with open arms!
The night before at the beach.
This is the Dingy Dock Pub. So neat.
WOOOOW. It is HOT here. I know that it was hot in the summer back in Alberta. But this heat is intense. I am not complaining though. The summer rays always bring out the kids in us.
I came home from work today, and Mama J. had the sprinkler spraying up as she's yelling, "Wanna come in my shower!!?" I
love it. Summer time is the ideal time of the year. Some people can't hack the heat. But I personally say, buck up and enjoy the weather. I understand it gets to be too hot, and people get grumpy and tired. But always remember, you could be other places quite unpleasant. Being at work in a place where most people travel to on vacation is punishement. But while I am there I think about where else I could be that is worse. The hospital came to mind. Can you imagine being sick in the hospital during the summer, or ever for that matter?Not necessarily someone in my life, but someone else in another life is in fact facing a struggle in a hospital. I think of her whenever I feel like complaining. I remember what it's like to visit someone sick in the hospital and how much I disliked it. I hate to imagine of what that would be like. To be sick, scared and have everyone around trying to act happier is just a plain old nightmare. I won't let on who it is, for it is someone that I do not know. But she's just a little girl that should be screaming and jumping through sprinklers herself. I think of her and hope that my comments might make her smile, if not only for a moment.
Last night I went out with the famdamily and celebrated the summer by floating on a boat, alongside the BC ferries, the marina and AN OCEAN PUB. It felt like I was on my own little mini-vacation. I had a hell of a busy day at work and then I got to be a tourist and drink beers and visit with family. It was the perfect reward.
I like these new people in my life. Thinking back to a year ago I would never have imagined life to be like this. Rob, Mom and I are all celebrating our one year of living here this week. It's a celebration of the times already shared, and the ones to follow.
I welcome this summer with open arms!
Tuesday, July 18, 2006
Sunday, July 16, 2006
This Promise
This is the ring I got for my birthday from lovely Rob. He gave it to me Friday night because he was too excited to wait until Sunday. "Promise To Love You Forever-Ring" I think it is absolutely perfect and it really suits who I am. He chose it first in the jewellery store and liked it right away.
To be honest I thought he was proposing and when he gave me the ring box I just stared at it...not wanting to see what was inside. I mean, yes I will marry him but not now, not yet. We have too many things to do before that will happen. As soon as I saw the colour of the stone I was thrilled, knowing that it was going to be a "love ya" kind of ring.
The picture was also taken with my new digital camera. All the pictures from my Birthday Bash turned out really well. I will post those pictures later on. I thought that this ring and what it means to me deserved a post all in itself.
One thing that I learned from my weekend was how much Rob really loves me. I see little pumping red hearts in his eyes when he looks at me. It is a secure and comforting feeling knowing someone in this world loves me, unconditionally. This feeling is also what helps me fall asleep at night, it's what gets me up smiling in the morning and this is what I want my life to be like.
Thank you Bob for this gift. It means wonders to me and I couldn't be prouder to wear this ring everyday.
A Day To Remember..
Day 2- Saturday, July 15th -- Haley's BBQ Birthday Bash
** I wanted a pic of Papa J.. but blogger isn't bein' cool.
Our Mamas at my party!!
Us girls...where's our missin' Linc?
Okay so I had a really awesome time at my BBQ this Saturday. Sooo many of Rob's family members showed up and I would be lieing if I said I wasn't teary eyed touched. I really appreciated them all making an appearance. The funny part was they ended up staying the longest out of everyone (except Ky and Joe who spent the night..!)
My aunt and uncle were away for their 25th wedding anniversary, so the are also exempt.. I know they would've been there for my day. Mama got me a digital camera for my birthday. A Fuji.. Which I must say, is fuckin' awesome. Sorry for the language but that is how excited I am about it.
Mama J and Papa J bought me a professional hair straightner. I was overly pleased with this little gifty poo. I love my hair really straight and this was the second thing I wanted after my camera. Way to go Junkies!!!! (pertaining to their last name..not a chronic problem..lol)
My mom came and as you can see from pictures, looked absolutely fabulous!! Her little green sweater and long, white hippy skirt..was too cute for words. She looked adorable and I couldn't be prouder than I was to show her off to everyone. Someone will snatch that cutie up in no time. And love her more than life!!
Robert was also just.... Words can't even begin to explain how much he did for me . He was an angel. My blue eyed baby, that rocks my little world here. I know it sounds lame and or cliche'. But he really did it up for my day. He was so happy just to see me .. laugh, or smile. It is touching to know that he loves me the way he does. We are happy. Things are good.
Rob's parents are also little angels..with beer and oilers..and love to share. They are the best of the best. If I could ask for better in laws I wouldn't. They truly did everything they could to make the day a special one for me.
Airhead took two hours to curl my hair for the party and as you can see from the pictures, looked really great! Amanda came with beautiful flowers for me and her cutie presence. I only wished they had given 'er with me. But I understand why the didn't. No worries, Baby J.
My sister and Joe came and enjoyed themselves!! That is all I wanted from them for my birthday. I wanted them to say that they had a wicked, good time with "my" family. (Rob's family, but hey..they're mine too damnit!!!)
My friends came by too. They didn't seem to enjoy it too much. But it wasn't for them it was for me. I think it was a little too family oriented for them. No biggy.
Oh I do have to have a little shout out to my buddy James. Rob's buddy, from when he worked at QF. He was so good with everyone, enjoying himself.. the food, the bud. He impressed me this weekend. Though I never expected any less. He was a perfect gentleman, and an ideal guy friend too. MUUAHHH.
There it is.. my special day in the sun, in my yard, with my famiy and my closest friends here. It does beat last year, even though I was with my other friends, I had more fun this year .. worry free, thanks to Bob.
Rob and Joe trying to start our fire..
Out of order...At the end of the night..being drunk
Amanda, Airhead and my sister..
No one has a pic like this I bet..
Thumbs up to the Fancy,Rum Drinks..
made with love alllllll night by Rob and Rod.
** I wanted a pic of Papa J.. but blogger isn't bein' cool.
Our Mamas at my party!!
Us girls...where's our missin' Linc?
Okay so I had a really awesome time at my BBQ this Saturday. Sooo many of Rob's family members showed up and I would be lieing if I said I wasn't teary eyed touched. I really appreciated them all making an appearance. The funny part was they ended up staying the longest out of everyone (except Ky and Joe who spent the night..!)
My aunt and uncle were away for their 25th wedding anniversary, so the are also exempt.. I know they would've been there for my day. Mama got me a digital camera for my birthday. A Fuji.. Which I must say, is fuckin' awesome. Sorry for the language but that is how excited I am about it.
Mama J and Papa J bought me a professional hair straightner. I was overly pleased with this little gifty poo. I love my hair really straight and this was the second thing I wanted after my camera. Way to go Junkies!!!! (pertaining to their last name..not a chronic problem..lol)
My mom came and as you can see from pictures, looked absolutely fabulous!! Her little green sweater and long, white hippy skirt..was too cute for words. She looked adorable and I couldn't be prouder than I was to show her off to everyone. Someone will snatch that cutie up in no time. And love her more than life!!
Robert was also just.... Words can't even begin to explain how much he did for me . He was an angel. My blue eyed baby, that rocks my little world here. I know it sounds lame and or cliche'. But he really did it up for my day. He was so happy just to see me .. laugh, or smile. It is touching to know that he loves me the way he does. We are happy. Things are good.
Rob's parents are also little angels..with beer and oilers..and love to share. They are the best of the best. If I could ask for better in laws I wouldn't. They truly did everything they could to make the day a special one for me.
Airhead took two hours to curl my hair for the party and as you can see from the pictures, looked really great! Amanda came with beautiful flowers for me and her cutie presence. I only wished they had given 'er with me. But I understand why the didn't. No worries, Baby J.
My sister and Joe came and enjoyed themselves!! That is all I wanted from them for my birthday. I wanted them to say that they had a wicked, good time with "my" family. (Rob's family, but hey..they're mine too damnit!!!)
My friends came by too. They didn't seem to enjoy it too much. But it wasn't for them it was for me. I think it was a little too family oriented for them. No biggy.
Oh I do have to have a little shout out to my buddy James. Rob's buddy, from when he worked at QF. He was so good with everyone, enjoying himself.. the food, the bud. He impressed me this weekend. Though I never expected any less. He was a perfect gentleman, and an ideal guy friend too. MUUAHHH.
There it is.. my special day in the sun, in my yard, with my famiy and my closest friends here. It does beat last year, even though I was with my other friends, I had more fun this year .. worry free, thanks to Bob.
Rob and Joe trying to start our fire..
Out of order...At the end of the night..being drunk
Amanda, Airhead and my sister..
No one has a pic like this I bet..
Thumbs up to the Fancy,Rum Drinks..
made with love alllllll night by Rob and Rod.
Friday, July 14, 2006
Be A Good Girl And Share~
Day 1 Haley's Birthday Weekend
Today really is my Friday! I couldn't be happier waking up this morning, or getting off of work this afternoon because it is Haley's Friday! Normally Saturday's are my Friday..the beginning of a weekend.
My birthday is on Sunday, so the celebration starts tomorrow. As for today, we are going to "Uncle" Bert's surprise 40th birthday party. So technically it is his birthday weekend too. Therefore, I have to share this weekend with him. But I don't mind in the least. It gives us something to do tonight, and I really enjoy this part of Rob's HUGE family. These are all of his dad's cousins, and they are great to be around. They are layed back, loud, fun and all that other good stuff that goes with GREAT in-laws. I love family and I realize it more as I grow up and experience a whole different kind of family values with Rob and Co.
This is also the last post I will be publishing that will not have pictures. As of tomorrow my mama is taking my digital camera shopping for my birthday!!! I am sooooooooooo freakin' excited, it's ridiculous. People are going to see waaay too much of my face after tomorrow. But I think it's going to be a good thing.
Happy birthday Uncle/Cousin-Sorta Bert!!
Today really is my Friday! I couldn't be happier waking up this morning, or getting off of work this afternoon because it is Haley's Friday! Normally Saturday's are my Friday..the beginning of a weekend.
My birthday is on Sunday, so the celebration starts tomorrow. As for today, we are going to "Uncle" Bert's surprise 40th birthday party. So technically it is his birthday weekend too. Therefore, I have to share this weekend with him. But I don't mind in the least. It gives us something to do tonight, and I really enjoy this part of Rob's HUGE family. These are all of his dad's cousins, and they are great to be around. They are layed back, loud, fun and all that other good stuff that goes with GREAT in-laws. I love family and I realize it more as I grow up and experience a whole different kind of family values with Rob and Co.
This is also the last post I will be publishing that will not have pictures. As of tomorrow my mama is taking my digital camera shopping for my birthday!!! I am sooooooooooo freakin' excited, it's ridiculous. People are going to see waaay too much of my face after tomorrow. But I think it's going to be a good thing.
Happy birthday Uncle/Cousin-Sorta Bert!!
Wednesday, July 12, 2006
Cutie Pie
It was a dreary day today. The rain was on and off and so were the crowds of people at work. Needless to say, it was steady but not overly busy. This makes me happy? No I am a bit tired. I always feel like I did so much more when I close the place. Maybe it's the vacuuming.
I have to write about my little encounter with a young man. He wasn't cute, or my type what so ever. He actually looks like a person that I would be kind of.. "blahed" by I guess. I can honestly say that he went about complimenting me in a very nice fashion. I was flattered.
He's ordering food from me, and it's like he just realized what I looked like.... when he says, "you're a cute girl, ya know that.." I was very cool and collected. Normally any talk like this makes me blush and bolt. But I just said thank you. He told me that I pulled off the hippy skirt I was wearing, again I thank him. I thanked him for all the compliments, saying that I don't mind them in the least.
As I am cleaning tables he enters again, and I smiled, as I do to all the customers. He approaches me again, and says, "Now you've got me curious, but... do you have a boyfriend?" And of course, I say yes I do. He said "SHUCKS." I don't think I've heard that one in a long time or for anyone under the age of 60. He goes on to tell me to tell my boyfriend that he is a very lucky guy.
Well what a darling. I don't care if he was hitting on me, even though it didn't feel like it. I felt great after work. My head is about four sizes bigger than it was when I arrived at work this morning. I feel great about myself. Lately I have been feeling down on my body and looks. Every woman knows what I mean. I know I look alright, but I still feel like I look a bit shittier. My hair won't go up easily, my stomach looks like it's sticking out a bit farther... my legs are jiggling...my legs aren't jiggling..??
Another funny thing is that Rob isn't the type to ignore my looks. He is a little flattering machine.. He tells me that I am sexy or that my hair looks pretty all of the time. He is a sweetheart. It's funny that a complete stranger can make me feel good about myself just by complimenting. Woman are all screwy. (and not in the sicky way some people are thinking)
So I feel like I look "cute" today. Hell there's nothing wrong with that. You know why??
Cause I'm "cute", that's why!!
I have to write about my little encounter with a young man. He wasn't cute, or my type what so ever. He actually looks like a person that I would be kind of.. "blahed" by I guess. I can honestly say that he went about complimenting me in a very nice fashion. I was flattered.
He's ordering food from me, and it's like he just realized what I looked like.... when he says, "you're a cute girl, ya know that.." I was very cool and collected. Normally any talk like this makes me blush and bolt. But I just said thank you. He told me that I pulled off the hippy skirt I was wearing, again I thank him. I thanked him for all the compliments, saying that I don't mind them in the least.
As I am cleaning tables he enters again, and I smiled, as I do to all the customers. He approaches me again, and says, "Now you've got me curious, but... do you have a boyfriend?" And of course, I say yes I do. He said "SHUCKS." I don't think I've heard that one in a long time or for anyone under the age of 60. He goes on to tell me to tell my boyfriend that he is a very lucky guy.
Well what a darling. I don't care if he was hitting on me, even though it didn't feel like it. I felt great after work. My head is about four sizes bigger than it was when I arrived at work this morning. I feel great about myself. Lately I have been feeling down on my body and looks. Every woman knows what I mean. I know I look alright, but I still feel like I look a bit shittier. My hair won't go up easily, my stomach looks like it's sticking out a bit farther... my legs are jiggling...my legs aren't jiggling..??
Another funny thing is that Rob isn't the type to ignore my looks. He is a little flattering machine.. He tells me that I am sexy or that my hair looks pretty all of the time. He is a sweetheart. It's funny that a complete stranger can make me feel good about myself just by complimenting. Woman are all screwy. (and not in the sicky way some people are thinking)
So I feel like I look "cute" today. Hell there's nothing wrong with that. You know why??
Cause I'm "cute", that's why!!
Friday, July 07, 2006
One Way Ticket
I sure feel out of the loop. Well, the HomeTown Loop I guess it would be called.
I send e-mails to my friend's mom every once in awhile. She's always very good at replying and always very informative about how her life is going, how my friend is doing, and sometimes more. I guess it is called gossip. But it isn't delivered in a negative, gossipy kind of way. I actually look forward to my updates every once in awhile. I am never expecting them, which is also quite nice.
It is strange though, being out of place when it comes to Hinton, a town I grew up in for all of my life. Just like that, I am out.. and news that I hear doesn't get to me until weeks, even months later. I probably don't even hearthe gossip around here, really. When other people, locals.. talk about other locals around here it's almost coded.
"Joanne Legacy is pregnanat AGAIN with Pat O'Connel's baby. I wonder what Rick Williams thinks!"
See, that's a code. I have no idea who those people are, so automatically I void all information. D.G.A.F (don't give a f***) But when it's people I know..I am right in there. I guess that is one thing my friends back home and I will always share. The knowledge.. of growing up in the same place, same people..similar interests in the small town huraahs.
A person passed away in Hinton last week. The name sounds so familiar and I do have a picture of him in my mind. But I don't really know who it is. This disturbs me because I may know him through other friends... I don't know..it's just strange not knowing this sort of thing.
Obviously I didn't know him well enough because I would recognize the name.. if I had. I just feel badly for whoever he left behind.
On a happier note, I am pleased at the same time to not know about all the small town bullshit because I am here! FAR AWAY from all that crap...and I couldn't be happier with that. It's not that I feel like I am any better than the people still living in Hinton. I am just blessed because I got a free ticket out and I took it. I came to such a gorgeous place to call my home and I met my new life, Rob.
I am out of the loop, but in my own that is much more significant and important to my life.
Rob's parents will be here tomorrow, for a month... a warm, summery month. My brother is coming in August just before Rob and I leave for our summer holiday in T. Bay. I have much to look forward to and very little to look back at.. in ol' H-Town.
I send e-mails to my friend's mom every once in awhile. She's always very good at replying and always very informative about how her life is going, how my friend is doing, and sometimes more. I guess it is called gossip. But it isn't delivered in a negative, gossipy kind of way. I actually look forward to my updates every once in awhile. I am never expecting them, which is also quite nice.
It is strange though, being out of place when it comes to Hinton, a town I grew up in for all of my life. Just like that, I am out.. and news that I hear doesn't get to me until weeks, even months later. I probably don't even hearthe gossip around here, really. When other people, locals.. talk about other locals around here it's almost coded.
"Joanne Legacy is pregnanat AGAIN with Pat O'Connel's baby. I wonder what Rick Williams thinks!"
See, that's a code. I have no idea who those people are, so automatically I void all information. D.G.A.F (don't give a f***) But when it's people I know..I am right in there. I guess that is one thing my friends back home and I will always share. The knowledge.. of growing up in the same place, same people..similar interests in the small town huraahs.
A person passed away in Hinton last week. The name sounds so familiar and I do have a picture of him in my mind. But I don't really know who it is. This disturbs me because I may know him through other friends... I don't know..it's just strange not knowing this sort of thing.
Obviously I didn't know him well enough because I would recognize the name.. if I had. I just feel badly for whoever he left behind.
On a happier note, I am pleased at the same time to not know about all the small town bullshit because I am here! FAR AWAY from all that crap...and I couldn't be happier with that. It's not that I feel like I am any better than the people still living in Hinton. I am just blessed because I got a free ticket out and I took it. I came to such a gorgeous place to call my home and I met my new life, Rob.
I am out of the loop, but in my own that is much more significant and important to my life.
Rob's parents will be here tomorrow, for a month... a warm, summery month. My brother is coming in August just before Rob and I leave for our summer holiday in T. Bay. I have much to look forward to and very little to look back at.. in ol' H-Town.
Sunday, July 02, 2006
A Peak At Reality
Victoria is a beautiful city. But there are some parts of it that aren't as appealing. Rob and I were walking from shop to shop soaking in the sun. We approached one building that was closed for the day. There was an entrance that was covered away from the heat and inside all we could see was a shopping cart, full of bottles and dirty blankets .. I didn't really notice. But beside it was a set of feet.. Someone sleeps there. A woman was hiding out from the sun just trying to have a nap. I know that these people make their own beds...or have problems or just made a lot of mistakes. Some have done nothing at all maybe just had a really hard life. Whatever the reason, it really helped me realize at my young age of 20... I have it pretty good. As I walked by I thought to myself, "and I have the nerve to complain about the dumbest shit...when someone is sleeping on the streets .. "
This just opened my eyes a little bit. The rest of the day was really pleasant. It wasn't outstanding, or action packed. But it was just nice to be able to walk around doing what we pleased.
Last night, July 1st.. Canada Day.. was also fun. We went down to the harbour where Kyli works. She got us all braceletts so that we could watch the fireworks on the marina. We sat out on a single dock, with no one else but us.. Rob sitting behind me, leaning over my shoulder.. and I snuggled back and just watched the bursting fireworks explode in front of me. The reflection against the water was magical. It was a wonderful way to celebrate another year in this beautiful, breathtaking country.
Today Rob taught me a new song to play on the guitar... Well roughly. I don't really know it well but the picture is of him teaching me. It's the new Dixie Chicks song.. "Not Ready To Make Nice". To be honest, we were laughing in the picture because he was showing me chord by chord..the song, "Dust In The Wind." Anyone who has seen "Old School" will get why we were laughing..
My sister caught a moment ... and I love how happy the both of us look.
Saturday, July 01, 2006
Happy Day
I have to say I love being Canadian!!
Happy day to my Rockin' Canada!
We're going to Victoria for the occasion and I will post more, with pictures!
Tuesday, June 27, 2006
Outside Looking In
He politely interrupts with a soft knock from the inside of the house. His youngest daughter is having a quiet puff of her cigarette on the back patio. It’s dark and she can only see his silouhette.
“What are you doing out in the dark?” He asks.
“I’m just thinking. I like it out here at night. I’m okay..” She replies assuringly.
He tells her that he’s off to bed for the night, that he has to work early and for her to be quiet so he can sleep. He always had a tough time falling asleep. She secretly thinks it is because he doesn’t want to miss out on the rest of his
families’ lives. He would listen and wait for someone to talk loudly on the phone, or bang around in the bathroom. He liked getting up and telling them to be quiet.
As he closes the door, he smiles and realizes that his little girl is full of emotion and thought. She was always a good kid and with that had a smart head on her shoulders.
He enters the living room where his wife lays snoring on the couch, the two puppies surrounding her doing the same. The living room is dim and the t.v is far too loud for the average person to fall asleep to.
“Hey, Kim wake up. I’m going to bed.” He gently pats her shoulder with his solid hands. He shakes her a little rough, but she is used to his clumsy nature.
“What... I’m just..going to stay up for a little bit longer.” She whispers as she fights her head from falling back to her pillow.
His wife is very stubborn and always joins him an hour or so after him once she wakes up again. He calls the puppies to follow him down the stairs towards his bedroom. His feet drag over the plastic lining covering the stairs, as the dogs' nails click with each step. It’s a familiar noise to his oldest daughter and son watching tv in the sitting room. They know that this is warning to turn their tv down and their voices down on the telephone. One is always watching the tv while the other blabs to his girlfriend on the phone.
They get the more official warning, than the youngest. These two always seemed to cause him the most grief when it came to keeping it down at night. But he loved them just the same. Knowing that they were old enough to move out on their own, they were bound to make a little more noise.
“Okay guys, I’m going to bed. Keep the tv down and please don’t talk too loud on the phone tonight. No fighting with your girlfriend.” His voice with authority, but kindness at the mention of his son’s ugly break up.
They agree and go right back to what they were doing. Telling him to have a good sleep.
He enters his room and the dogs jump lazily up on the bed before him. Their tails wagging waiting for him to join them. He undresses and gets into his bed, wrapping the covers right up to his chest.
He sighs loudly as this is the first time he gets to really relax today. He lays there first with his eyes open, looking at the roof. He listens to all the normal noises of his house. His youngest is quietly slipping into the house, carefully clicking the back door closed. He smiles. The other two are quietly talking to one another. Their voices are muffled and faint, just as he’s used to. He can just hear his wife snoring on the couch. He smiles again. His life is fufilled. He has all that he has ever wanted. A nice, warm home to live in. A wife that loves him more than anything imaginable. He has three healthy, happy children that he raised with such care and understanding. He has his family. With that he rolls over and snaps his lamp off..
**Something I wrote in Rudi's point of view
“What are you doing out in the dark?” He asks.
“I’m just thinking. I like it out here at night. I’m okay..” She replies assuringly.
He tells her that he’s off to bed for the night, that he has to work early and for her to be quiet so he can sleep. He always had a tough time falling asleep. She secretly thinks it is because he doesn’t want to miss out on the rest of his
families’ lives. He would listen and wait for someone to talk loudly on the phone, or bang around in the bathroom. He liked getting up and telling them to be quiet.
As he closes the door, he smiles and realizes that his little girl is full of emotion and thought. She was always a good kid and with that had a smart head on her shoulders.
He enters the living room where his wife lays snoring on the couch, the two puppies surrounding her doing the same. The living room is dim and the t.v is far too loud for the average person to fall asleep to.
“Hey, Kim wake up. I’m going to bed.” He gently pats her shoulder with his solid hands. He shakes her a little rough, but she is used to his clumsy nature.
“What... I’m just..going to stay up for a little bit longer.” She whispers as she fights her head from falling back to her pillow.
His wife is very stubborn and always joins him an hour or so after him once she wakes up again. He calls the puppies to follow him down the stairs towards his bedroom. His feet drag over the plastic lining covering the stairs, as the dogs' nails click with each step. It’s a familiar noise to his oldest daughter and son watching tv in the sitting room. They know that this is warning to turn their tv down and their voices down on the telephone. One is always watching the tv while the other blabs to his girlfriend on the phone.
They get the more official warning, than the youngest. These two always seemed to cause him the most grief when it came to keeping it down at night. But he loved them just the same. Knowing that they were old enough to move out on their own, they were bound to make a little more noise.
“Okay guys, I’m going to bed. Keep the tv down and please don’t talk too loud on the phone tonight. No fighting with your girlfriend.” His voice with authority, but kindness at the mention of his son’s ugly break up.
They agree and go right back to what they were doing. Telling him to have a good sleep.
He enters his room and the dogs jump lazily up on the bed before him. Their tails wagging waiting for him to join them. He undresses and gets into his bed, wrapping the covers right up to his chest.
He sighs loudly as this is the first time he gets to really relax today. He lays there first with his eyes open, looking at the roof. He listens to all the normal noises of his house. His youngest is quietly slipping into the house, carefully clicking the back door closed. He smiles. The other two are quietly talking to one another. Their voices are muffled and faint, just as he’s used to. He can just hear his wife snoring on the couch. He smiles again. His life is fufilled. He has all that he has ever wanted. A nice, warm home to live in. A wife that loves him more than anything imaginable. He has three healthy, happy children that he raised with such care and understanding. He has his family. With that he rolls over and snaps his lamp off..
**Something I wrote in Rudi's point of view
Monday, June 26, 2006
Summer time..when the livins' easy..
I have come to realize that I am enjoying my early mornings a lot more than I've ever before. I feel like I have too much to do in one day off that I actually need to get up at 8:00 so that I have a full day.
Yesterday was my favourite day in a long time. First, it was Rob and Haley's Sunday together which is always better than any day in Haley and Rob's Work Your Ass Off Week. We got up early and layed in bed just talking for a bit. I love those kinds of mornings where you've been up for an hour but you're still in bed chatting with each other. We got up and went to where I work for our cheap breakfast, and sat out on the patio in the already hot sun. We were trying to decide where we would go swimming when I figured out that we were already like all the locals around here. No one likes to swim in the ocean. Everyone's busy looking for pools, lakes...anything but the spectacular ocean that is Qualicum Beach.. Hence...the name of your freakin' town !!!
Our first journey to the beach was kind of like one of those..... "maybe we should scratch that one and start over.." We were bickering at one another for stupid reasons. (FYI- have my period!!!) So we left to make some sandwiches and basically to get out of the scorching sun. It is difficult to be bloated, bitchy, complaining non-stop in the heat of B.C to a person that doesn't care about any of the above and especially won't put up with non-stop complaining. Well excccccccccuse me for being grumpy! On the way home, there was a car that had the license plate.. BEHAPEE. Rob said that was for us, obviously. After that we both perked up.
Our friend James joined us at the beach for Round 2. We played botchie ball and frisbee on a sandbar in the ocean. It was just glorious out. I was chatting with regulars from work as they walked by and a lady with a dog just like my dad has. Apparently this makes me more outgoing and an expert.
Overly Happy Dog Expert Haley: "She's a beauty. Must be a pup. Yeah, she's adorable. You know those kind of dogs age well. You'll be very happy with her!"
W.T.F was I talking about??? Regardless Rob was beaming when I returned to the blanket. He thought it was a nice change from our first visit to the beach. It really was.
We hurried away from the beach by 2 so that we could visit my friend Lauren at her house to swim in her pool.
It was rated 14A, meaning her step mom and dad were there. Along with 5 year old Rudy and 1 year old Faith. These kids were so adorable. Rudy had blonde curly hair and was a complete host the entire time. We had a good time with him. He was showing us his motorized Jeep, from his baby chick Peepers. (which I thought I killed when he put it in my hands. Apparently baby chicks just pass out when they're warm. They fall right asleep instantly!!)
The day was awesome. The boys organized a little BBQ in the backyard while I made new cd's for myself. (mine were stolen, but I'm not getting into that!!!!) They set up a table in the grass with chairs and a fully set table to eat our dinner at. Sometimes men surprise me.
I had a heart to heart with Baby J. before she went to the beach. I dressed her up in all my clothes because like me she's burnt from head to toe. She needed something without straps...and a loose skirt. I am the skirt queen, so she came to the right place.
Summer is finally here. I am up so early today because I am planning on duplicating my yesterday, the best I can. I'm covered head to toe in aloe vera. I look like a shiny, glowing tomatoe..who is prepared for another HOT day by the pool in the sun.
Choi.
Yesterday was my favourite day in a long time. First, it was Rob and Haley's Sunday together which is always better than any day in Haley and Rob's Work Your Ass Off Week. We got up early and layed in bed just talking for a bit. I love those kinds of mornings where you've been up for an hour but you're still in bed chatting with each other. We got up and went to where I work for our cheap breakfast, and sat out on the patio in the already hot sun. We were trying to decide where we would go swimming when I figured out that we were already like all the locals around here. No one likes to swim in the ocean. Everyone's busy looking for pools, lakes...anything but the spectacular ocean that is Qualicum Beach.. Hence...the name of your freakin' town !!!
Our first journey to the beach was kind of like one of those..... "maybe we should scratch that one and start over.." We were bickering at one another for stupid reasons. (FYI- have my period!!!) So we left to make some sandwiches and basically to get out of the scorching sun. It is difficult to be bloated, bitchy, complaining non-stop in the heat of B.C to a person that doesn't care about any of the above and especially won't put up with non-stop complaining. Well excccccccccuse me for being grumpy! On the way home, there was a car that had the license plate.. BEHAPEE. Rob said that was for us, obviously. After that we both perked up.
Our friend James joined us at the beach for Round 2. We played botchie ball and frisbee on a sandbar in the ocean. It was just glorious out. I was chatting with regulars from work as they walked by and a lady with a dog just like my dad has. Apparently this makes me more outgoing and an expert.
Overly Happy Dog Expert Haley: "She's a beauty. Must be a pup. Yeah, she's adorable. You know those kind of dogs age well. You'll be very happy with her!"
W.T.F was I talking about??? Regardless Rob was beaming when I returned to the blanket. He thought it was a nice change from our first visit to the beach. It really was.
We hurried away from the beach by 2 so that we could visit my friend Lauren at her house to swim in her pool.
It was rated 14A, meaning her step mom and dad were there. Along with 5 year old Rudy and 1 year old Faith. These kids were so adorable. Rudy had blonde curly hair and was a complete host the entire time. We had a good time with him. He was showing us his motorized Jeep, from his baby chick Peepers. (which I thought I killed when he put it in my hands. Apparently baby chicks just pass out when they're warm. They fall right asleep instantly!!)
The day was awesome. The boys organized a little BBQ in the backyard while I made new cd's for myself. (mine were stolen, but I'm not getting into that!!!!) They set up a table in the grass with chairs and a fully set table to eat our dinner at. Sometimes men surprise me.
I had a heart to heart with Baby J. before she went to the beach. I dressed her up in all my clothes because like me she's burnt from head to toe. She needed something without straps...and a loose skirt. I am the skirt queen, so she came to the right place.
Summer is finally here. I am up so early today because I am planning on duplicating my yesterday, the best I can. I'm covered head to toe in aloe vera. I look like a shiny, glowing tomatoe..who is prepared for another HOT day by the pool in the sun.
Choi.
Monday, June 19, 2006
D-Day, or so I thought..
Blogs are for personal thoughts without a care ... or consideration of who reads it. I may sound a bit crazy in this post but I can't care. Truth be told it!
A few nights ago Edmonton won their 6th game in the Stanley cup Finals to Carolina. I was ecstatic as this means that there really is a chance for Edmonton to win Stanley. They haven't won it all since 1990. And it has been ten years since Edmonton has even advanced into the conference final. So this is a really big deal for the Edmonton Oilers and their fans. When they won on Saturday, this made it possible for them to win tonight, game 7.. Lord Stanely's cup! Carolina was leading the series.. 3-1.. and for people who don't know what that means.. Edmonton had to win three games in a row and Carolina just needed one more victory and the cup was theirs. Well Edmonton has won 2 games now and tonight is the night.
Anyways, waaaay off topic. I was quite excited and I took to drinking some wine. I didn't drink as much as I usually do. The wine was left over from last week so I didn't drink an entire bottle or half for that matter. I "smoke" a little when I feel like it and so I went to doing that..
Rob's friend looked quite strange to me .. he was saying things that I couldn't really understand anymore. Rob was on my right singing Bob Marley songs.. No Woman No Cry..Three Little Birds. That was it, my head was spinning.. I couldn't function properly, let alone think at all. I just got up and headed for the bathroom. I layed there in a ball hoping that I would stop spinning and come to my senses. The next thing I knew, not aware of how much time went by.. Rob was in the bathroom with me. He was trying to move me, telling me to sit up. Instantly I began my puking marathon. Of course the toilet seat was down and I had messed all over the top and side of it..hitting the garbage for the last bit. I won't get into great detail about the puke and how many times I threw up. But it lasted awhile..an hour or two.
I can honestly say that I was so out of it that I really thought that I was dieing. I was finished on this earth and I was not going to be around anymore. This is the most terrifying feeling. I didn't know who I was, what I was, where I was... I didn't know anything. Finally I came to and Rob is telling me to breathe, to look at him..to focus on something, anything. Apparently I was convulsing and my eyes were rolling into the back of my head. This is because I was passing out with my eyes open, but at the time I probably looked like I was posessed. Like off of the Exorcist when she's puking green (pea soup) all over the room. In my case it was strawberries..lol. Yes I decided to eat an entire container of strawberries about fifteen minutes before my little trip. What I realized after I was out of it and "dieing".. was that Rob kept his cool the entire time. He held my head out of the toilet so that I wouldn't be gurgling in toilet water. He let me lay on my side and puke and then he would gently lift my head wipe everything off of the tile. Then he would wipe my mouth and face so that I was clean. Eventually I was starting to pass out and so he picked up my dead weight and put me on his side of the bed. He undressed me and got me some water, which I refused to drink. I woke again at 4 and he was sitting up behind me making sure I was breathing.. Wow.
The first thing my mom said when I told her this story wasn't what I thought it would be. She said, "You keep this one." And she is totally right. For a bit I was questioning myself. Was I good enough for him. He showed me so much love and devotion, was I giving him the same? I felt like I was lacking the involvement and care in our relationship. I was taking Bob for granted. I loved him the whole time but I was questioning it for much of it.
NOW I am sooooo happy. I am SOOOOOO in love. I think that night had to happen because I needed to realize it. I think that these unfortunate things happen in life, like getting so f*ct up and puking all over myself, for a reason, to help us realize what we have. I have a beautiful life. I need to get my head out of the "doubt" hole and live my life!
All day yesterday I felt so strange. Most likely I was just really hung over and weak. But Rob let me be lazy while he tidied up our house. He did something like four loads of laundry. As the night progressed I thought for some reason that this might be my last night. Maybe I was so happy because I was meant to die tonight. What?? I don't know where this insecurity came from but it was certainly there. I told Rob to check on me if he woke in the middle of the night to make sure that I was okay. He promised. He looked concerned that I was thinking this but not once did he question me, doubt me.. he respected my crazy concerns and went to bed. Wow.
I'm lucky. For being so crazy, I should be alone and I am the opposite of that. I have everything and everyone I love in my life. (- one) !
I think I am afraid of dieing because of Rudi. I think that I fear the unknown because I know that I am not ready to go. Rudi wasn't ready to go if you asked him a month before he was diagnosed..he would have said "Hell no! I want to live my life!" Let's be honest, most people aren't ready to go. They might accept their fate..but they weren't ready. So I fear death because it could be at any time.. I am not completely weird where I won't fly in a plane or drive in a car in fear of an accident. But I think I was so aware of the death issue yesterday because it was Father's Day. I mean I really thought I was dieing the other night. That is some scary stuff.
I feel like I really went through something major. I feel renewed, saved and refreshed. I feel like celebrating my life.. I need to take time to celebrate the fact that I am breathing and experiencing life. A lot of people take things for granted.
Take a minute to just breathe and be thankful for it.
A few nights ago Edmonton won their 6th game in the Stanley cup Finals to Carolina. I was ecstatic as this means that there really is a chance for Edmonton to win Stanley. They haven't won it all since 1990. And it has been ten years since Edmonton has even advanced into the conference final. So this is a really big deal for the Edmonton Oilers and their fans. When they won on Saturday, this made it possible for them to win tonight, game 7.. Lord Stanely's cup! Carolina was leading the series.. 3-1.. and for people who don't know what that means.. Edmonton had to win three games in a row and Carolina just needed one more victory and the cup was theirs. Well Edmonton has won 2 games now and tonight is the night.
Anyways, waaaay off topic. I was quite excited and I took to drinking some wine. I didn't drink as much as I usually do. The wine was left over from last week so I didn't drink an entire bottle or half for that matter. I "smoke" a little when I feel like it and so I went to doing that..
Rob's friend looked quite strange to me .. he was saying things that I couldn't really understand anymore. Rob was on my right singing Bob Marley songs.. No Woman No Cry..Three Little Birds. That was it, my head was spinning.. I couldn't function properly, let alone think at all. I just got up and headed for the bathroom. I layed there in a ball hoping that I would stop spinning and come to my senses. The next thing I knew, not aware of how much time went by.. Rob was in the bathroom with me. He was trying to move me, telling me to sit up. Instantly I began my puking marathon. Of course the toilet seat was down and I had messed all over the top and side of it..hitting the garbage for the last bit. I won't get into great detail about the puke and how many times I threw up. But it lasted awhile..an hour or two.
I can honestly say that I was so out of it that I really thought that I was dieing. I was finished on this earth and I was not going to be around anymore. This is the most terrifying feeling. I didn't know who I was, what I was, where I was... I didn't know anything. Finally I came to and Rob is telling me to breathe, to look at him..to focus on something, anything. Apparently I was convulsing and my eyes were rolling into the back of my head. This is because I was passing out with my eyes open, but at the time I probably looked like I was posessed. Like off of the Exorcist when she's puking green (pea soup) all over the room. In my case it was strawberries..lol. Yes I decided to eat an entire container of strawberries about fifteen minutes before my little trip. What I realized after I was out of it and "dieing".. was that Rob kept his cool the entire time. He held my head out of the toilet so that I wouldn't be gurgling in toilet water. He let me lay on my side and puke and then he would gently lift my head wipe everything off of the tile. Then he would wipe my mouth and face so that I was clean. Eventually I was starting to pass out and so he picked up my dead weight and put me on his side of the bed. He undressed me and got me some water, which I refused to drink. I woke again at 4 and he was sitting up behind me making sure I was breathing.. Wow.
The first thing my mom said when I told her this story wasn't what I thought it would be. She said, "You keep this one." And she is totally right. For a bit I was questioning myself. Was I good enough for him. He showed me so much love and devotion, was I giving him the same? I felt like I was lacking the involvement and care in our relationship. I was taking Bob for granted. I loved him the whole time but I was questioning it for much of it.
NOW I am sooooo happy. I am SOOOOOO in love. I think that night had to happen because I needed to realize it. I think that these unfortunate things happen in life, like getting so f*ct up and puking all over myself, for a reason, to help us realize what we have. I have a beautiful life. I need to get my head out of the "doubt" hole and live my life!
All day yesterday I felt so strange. Most likely I was just really hung over and weak. But Rob let me be lazy while he tidied up our house. He did something like four loads of laundry. As the night progressed I thought for some reason that this might be my last night. Maybe I was so happy because I was meant to die tonight. What?? I don't know where this insecurity came from but it was certainly there. I told Rob to check on me if he woke in the middle of the night to make sure that I was okay. He promised. He looked concerned that I was thinking this but not once did he question me, doubt me.. he respected my crazy concerns and went to bed. Wow.
I'm lucky. For being so crazy, I should be alone and I am the opposite of that. I have everything and everyone I love in my life. (- one) !
I think I am afraid of dieing because of Rudi. I think that I fear the unknown because I know that I am not ready to go. Rudi wasn't ready to go if you asked him a month before he was diagnosed..he would have said "Hell no! I want to live my life!" Let's be honest, most people aren't ready to go. They might accept their fate..but they weren't ready. So I fear death because it could be at any time.. I am not completely weird where I won't fly in a plane or drive in a car in fear of an accident. But I think I was so aware of the death issue yesterday because it was Father's Day. I mean I really thought I was dieing the other night. That is some scary stuff.
I feel like I really went through something major. I feel renewed, saved and refreshed. I feel like celebrating my life.. I need to take time to celebrate the fact that I am breathing and experiencing life. A lot of people take things for granted.
Take a minute to just breathe and be thankful for it.
Wednesday, June 14, 2006
The Scoop
She's home from T.Bay. I missed her. AND her results came back.. Baby J. is A-O.K
I'm very relieved. I'm sure she is too. She looks to be right back to her normal self.
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